Monday, March 07, 2011

I want my boy back..

Well, Johnny and I broke up again last night, and I don't think we'll be getting back together. I'd like to, but I doubt we will.
When I woke up a few minutes ago, I remembered, but thought it was a dream, and got happy that it was only a dream, but then remembered that it wasn't a dream. That really sucked. A lot.
Anyways, last night I spent the night at his house, and I had a lot of fun, and he seemed to, as well. Then, around 7:30 tonight, he just said it. He said he doesn't feel like that towards me now, and he doesn't want to feel like he's leading me on.
He dropped me off around 8:30. I spent the majority of my time with him crying, and then when I got home, I spent the next 40 minutes crying the entire time, waiting for him to come on MSN... Then, when he came on MSN, I continued crying. And we talked more, and I managed to tell him more about how I feel about him. Last week I had kind of decided that when we broke up, I would. So, I did tell him most of it. He seemed to appreciate most of it, and that it at least made him feel good. Which is good.
The roof of my mouth hurts from crying... I don't even understand how it's possible.
Johnny and I will still be friends of course. I wrote "Johnny and I will still last" at first... I'm glad we'll still be friends, but it;s not what I want.
My hair smells just like him.
I don't know what else to write right now, and I have a headache and feel sick, it's been over a day since I ate.  So, I'm going to go back to bed now.

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